Cole was doing great a few weeks ago and having fun running and playing in the back yard. We celebrated his 6 month ampuversary on the 11th and were enjoying summer. He was loving eating snap peas while helping me in the garden and playing a new game we invented where I steal his stick and he chases me to steal it back. The next week, he seemed tired and we thought he was overdoing it a bit with the playing and spent a little more time being couch potatoes together. The next week, he had a lump on his side and was breathing funny and starting to cough. We took him in for a checkup and x-rays right away and Friday the results confirmed our worst fears. The cancer has metastasized to his lungs and skin and it is fast.

We have been in contact with our oncologist over the weekend and went in today. We have been on Lomustine since he finished his Carboplatin last month. Our doctor started him on Vinorelbine today to try and target the lungs. If he responds, she hopes we can have another 4 to 6 months of good time left. If not, well……we will face that when we have to. He will not suffer but we can’t give up on him if he has a chance at more good time. Our doctor thinks he still has time.

I hate this. His doctor assures me he is not uncomfortable and is getting plenty of air but I hate seeing him breathe like this. I haven’t slept much because when it is quiet and still, I can’t help but listen to his breath and check on him over and over. I have panic attacks thinking he is struggling for air but my doctor assures me this is not the case. I really hope he responds and can be comfortable.

I’m too tired to put up a photo but for those of you who use Instagram, look for the #coleporterthemastiff tag or see it here in your browser. You can see him running and playing and cuddling Ella. Sorry for the disjointed post, it is hard to concentrate right now. I’m going back to holding him while we watch really scary movies now.